Final Wishes of Tom Carr

Funeral or memorial service

Cremate me and scatter my ashes into the ocean at Tybee Island. Put a granite marker on the plot where my fathers marker is in the Laurel Grove North Cemetery in Savannah. We have plot 1500 on Aisle 13. You may have to move my fathers marker to fit mine in, which is fine. Laurel Grove phone 912-651-6772. A company named DePue Inc did daddy's marker and they did a good job. Their phone number is 912-233-3096.

I am a member of the Memorial Society of Georgia, so I get a cheap cremation.  My provider is Lincoln Funeral at 770-289-1510.   Call them first.   If any problems call Memorial Society of Georgia at 404-634-2896.

Do any kind of memorial service you want. I will be gone and this will be more for you than for me. When daddy died, Rocky and I got together and it was just the 2 of us scattering ashes at the beach, and in that situation I think it was the best thing to do. When Dan O. died, there was a huge memorial service with hundreds of his friends, each person saying what they wanted, and in that situation I think that was the best thing to do.   Use your heart and judgement and do what seems best.  Remember it is for you, not for me.

If you do some kind of big service and want someone to lead it, Brother Shankara at the Vedanta center is currently the guy I would pick.  If you want music, ask Glenn Phillips to play.  The big thing to remember is how much I loved you all and how much happiness you gave me. Writting this now I feel so greatful to all the people who gave me the gift of friendship and love. I hope I was able to return some of that.  If anyone feels any guilt about anything they did or did not do for me or too me, please know that all is forgiven. 

Read this when I die

I am dead now.  There may be some talk about me living on in some other realm, dimension or heaven.  All of these things are possible.  It is also possible that I just ceased to exist.  I don't know.  You don't know.  Nobody knows.

I discovered something wonderful while I was alive.  I discovered something that freed me from the fear of death and non existence.  It freed me from any concern that I might live on after death.  I want you to discover it too.  Nothing I say will give you the experience, but I might be able to point you in a certain direction so you can see it for yourself. 

You don't exist in the sense that you think you exist.  You are not a thing that stretches through time.  You are this moment of awareness.  That is the greatest miracle I know.  In the moments when I saw it clearly, it was everything I ever wanted, everything I ever dreamed of, and more.  Sometimes I would shout "Praise God Hallelujah" and I didn't even believe in God.  That wonderful freedom from the illusion that I had anything to protect, or anything to gain.  I want you to have that. 

This is real.  I promise you.  It changed my life.

I don't want you to waste your time on fantasies about my living on after my body dies. 

There is nothing to die.  There is awareness.  It always changes. 

In some sense you are being born and dying in every moment. 

I became aware of this intellectually by reading and thinking.  I became aware of this deep in my being as an experience totally real beyond any doubt by doing a meditation practice called Vipassana.  There are lots of other ways to experience this truth.  If what I am saying appeals to you, find something that works for you.  Or ignore all of this.  Maybe you found something that is better for you. 

It anyone talks about me living on in some other realm, read this to them.


Financial Information

Katherine has my will and it says she gets everything.   There are benifficiary clauses in some of my brokerage accounts that my give some money to other people.  Benificiary clause over rides the will.
 
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